The Hammer

fifty thousand cries wide
courage and fear sitting side by side
their brave blood bubbling red
across the killing field, then fled
into the gathering night
atop a crazed horse with a severed Arab head
and hands and feet instead
of victory at the Battle of Tours
where Charles Martel halted a mad horde
with his infantry's mighty sword
saving Christianity and it's Lord
blocking an Islamic House of War
smashing them with the legendary strength of Thor
his soldiers stopped their slaughtering European advance
into this quiet part of northern France
making famous the defeat of the mighty Moor
on October 10, seven thirty two

Thich Quang Duc, Vietnamese Mahayana Buddhist monk

it was simply time for HIM to begin:
the flames on his skin
were fire
and serenity shooting higher
into the guilty air aimed at Diem
before formal talks begin somewhere
in the late afternoon
hopefully conducted soon, very soon
his calm eyes were wide in dry morning pain
in focus and perfectly, lucidly sane
no cell phone ringing
no chorus line singing
no appointments to be made
no debt willingly unpaid
no thoughts of shopping for an automobile
no deal to seal
nothing apparently left behind
perhaps a glimmer of hope for mankind
i saw the orange robe on a Saigon street
i saw his charred feet
in 1963
when the monk looked directly at me
with burned hands and shaved head
i knew he was dead
but i had wrestling practice in an hour
and a banana to eat and a cut flower
to buy for a blond girl and a kiss
that i surely didn't want to miss
then a late bottle to share with smooth Jake
under the tiled roof of a pavilion by his uncle's lake
i couldn't be expected to miss these chances,
these fleeting moments like high school romances
but i knew he was dead,
as i already said, 

but his memory will never die.

The Nearness of You

here is the tool, the key
to what can make a famous symphony
the salesman smilingly said
with his bald head
at six foot four or more
in his tailored suit he asked if i'd like a tea
but really
i said touching the piano with great care
actually, with my practiced flair
i'd like to play a scale or two
maybe a song, one of my chosen few
so i sat on the bench with ready ease
and adjusted myself while he uttered "Please"
as i began to tap and rap and finger from the heart
a gentle concerto from Mozart
number twenty one - Andante
listen to it, i say
a young beauty carrying her cup of tea
walked near and pointedly
asked if i knew
Serenade in Blue
naturally i quickly switched to Glenn Miller
as any helmsman would with his tiller
when the currents proved outrageous
my new situation i deemed advantageous
with the smiling lady who liked my style
she sat on the bench for a sustained while
the salesman never brought the tea
for me
but together
i played and she sang Stormy Weather
my fingers were right with every sharp and flat
i left with my cane and hat
and a sweet-voiced lady on my arm
full of charm

And so it goes...

three NVA soldiers were killed
early in the morning
by Sky soldiers during a 10 minute
fire fight
in Binh Dinh Province
and three AK47 rifles were recovered,
as were 10 pistols, 10 rucksacks, and
a large quantity of medical
supplies.
A 40 bunker complex was discovered
in the Xuan Loc area by Company C,
3rd Battalion, 22nd Infantry.
In addition, a team of Rangers
of the 75th Infantry located and
searched 12 to 16 bunkers four miles
west of Dau Tieng.
Later in the afternoon, Company C,
1st Battalion, 12th Cav., moved
into the location and set up a
night defensive position.
Six bunkers were destroyed by
C troop, 3rd Squadron, 4th Cav.,
2 1/2 miles north of FSB Woods, and
three more enemy positions were
eliminated just north of the
Michelin rubber plantation by Company A,
2nd Battalion, 14th Infantry.
An element of the Americal Division made
contact with enemy forces twice during
the afternoon of September 15, 1970
and with the help of helicopter gunships
killed 30 during the largest action of the
week ending September 20th.

ten minutes on my bicycle

ten minutes on my bicycle is worth more than a week at the Jersey shore walking the sandy beach leaving imprints a good detective could gather hints from how deeply my bare feet sank 

so no, i would never go to a full services bank 

i'd go directly to a chair to read and drink 

watching the tidal pool i'd think of Latin phrases and the root word of the most recent medical term i heard i couldn't imagine myself in a cave 

i would be tempted not to shave 

if i became sweaty and hot, 

i'd still pedal instead of trot

i'd want a kiss from which I'd reminisce 

it's considerably easier to ride with an ice-filled water bladder on my back wearing my Giro helmet and sunglasses 

enjoying the afternoon as it passes 

ten minutes on my bicycle is worth more than a single bed at the Blue Hotel 

walking around back to see the bloody fight not far from the railroad tracks at night where the Swede really got what he deserved 

ten minutes on my bike i braked and swerved 

because it was snowing and i was down in Crane's midwest Nebraska town

making circles in the sand like a circus clown.

Patti Smith

i'm hot and down in old Mexico
my body naked from head to toe
escaping from a North Atlantic storm
until later your arms keep me warm.

sipping wine with friends of mine
drinking beer while you're still here

listening to the Beatles twist and shout:
we sit wondering what it's all about!

i saw Patti Smith in a border bar
she asked me again how you are!

she sang about lovers in the warm southern night.

she threw me a kiss in the broad daylight.

she had male friends who liked to pose.

they applied lipstick to their toes.

sipping wine with friends of mine
drinking beer while you're still here

listening to the Beatles twist and shout
we sit wondering what it's all about!

i saw refugees from a small Honduran town
crying men not making a sound
leaving for Paradise on their midnight ride
looking for anything to maintain their pride.

their children had wide eyes with tears

mouthing words flavored with their fears.

i saw Paris on a big screen TV
dressed as usual tres provocatively:
i heard her when she finally said
if i were poor i'd rather be dead.

sipping wine with friends of mine
drinking beer while you're still here

i'm sitting on my cloud of dreams
unsure of what this temporary existence means.

each moment preceeds the past
until my breath can barely last.

sipping wine with friends of mine
drinking beer while you're still here

listening to the Beatles twist and shout:
we sit wondering what it's all about!

5 nights

five nights
and i'm cooking stew
resting by the fireside
thinking of you
i'm sipping my tea
reading a book
remembering all the days
to here it took
then finding a pillow
before eleven
getting out of bed
sometime around seven
watching the oil
gushing from a hole
feeling the silence
empty my soul
five nights
and i'm sixty-two
still riding the train
thinking of you
and out the window
beyond the steel track
my life as pages
with no turning back
five nights
and i'm riding away
but no one is asking
for me to stay
bright city lights
the countryside
i can't find
a place to hide
using my hammer
or welding torch
i'll make myself
a new back porch
under the stars
by the small pond
like a fairy
with her tiny wand
i'll sip paradise
with a chocolate milk
and a ruby slipper
and a robe of silk
under the sky
if it doesn't rain
i could be reading
Roughing It by Twain
five nights
and i'm tying my shoe
ready for hiking
thinking of you

Judy Collins

my name is Judy Collins
with a most beautiful smile
opening a simple folk song
playing for you, awhile
with high hopes of singing melody
in a lively rock and roll band
underneath the 60's boardwalk
on the wet and silver sand
with Stephen Stills and his gentle hair
watching the clowns
twisting through the air
never knowing if they'll ever
manage to travel anywhere
into time passing by and slowly
into the new tomorrow
into our broken hallways
where i have no need for sorrow
when i have you on my mind
inside my secret garden
where often i have dined
with flowers and special friendships
i hear that someday very soon
war will fade from memory
we will see the rising of the moon
turn the pirate ships
into tender lover's lips
it will reach across the stage
to free a lonely heart locked within it's cage
and welcome in the new dawn
before our laughter is all gone
my name is Judy Collins
and if i had the choice
i would bring a special memory
with heartfelt diamonds in my voice

Team 95

the ground was hard
walking softly
inside the wire at Team 95
near Bien Hoi outside Saigon
at the very moment you took a dive
from the high board
checking your watch for the correct time
while i worried about a friend of mine
you didn't know him
slicing through the water of your pool
i know you thought you were so damn cool
our fire mission was over
now the radio chatter
started to really matter
as i was walking past the wall
of sandbags stacked old and tall
near the cement bunker
near my sack
where i would sleep
occasionally not often deep
i know you thought my life was thin
but wait, it fades
i could hear the thump of blades
far at first but closer the sound
i didn't have to turn around
my chopper pad was near the watch tower
your practice session lasted only one hour
and then you were soaked in the locker room
soaked like a champagne groom
soaked like a sponge in an evening shower
inadvertently dropped and full of itself
i felt the rotor wash
pieces of flying dirt
you never hurt
rushing to class
round eyed girls and more
i on the other hand at war
didn't have your chance to swim
i played a game of numbers
how many KIA or MIA or AWOL
or Chu Hoi or R&R or on leave
or in formation and ready to go
sick or in jail
it would never fail
i didn't know
sometimes fucked up and didn't care
where were you in all of this?
anywhere?

shark

there is blood only for a little while
a small stain on my shirt
i watch the dampness spreading
but it doesn't really hurt

it doesn't really know your name
or where you've been before

this feeling hasn't knocked me down
in fact i'll ask for more

and when you bite me next time
while hiding in the dark
i'll bring my little fish along
to chase away your shark

rattlesnake country

i am a cowboy
on the Texas prairie
riding my horse like an electric guitar
to dusty El Paso on the morning star
hitting the high notes
by my drunken camp fire
watching the low end
waiting for the dawn
drinking my warm beer until i'm crazy and gone
whistling for coffee
cattle and women
finding some water in a hole to go swimming
wide open spaces
and Alamo charm
a late night saloon with Yellow Rose on my arm
running from Dallas
no showing my face
it won't be tomorrow that the hanging takes place
i am a cowboy
a brand on my ass
heading to Austin and going first class
girl on my saddle
whiskey in my throat
humming a tune that honey just wrote
rattlesnake country
and devil weed town
no sheriff's posse can be pulling me down
i am a cowboy
on the Texas prairie
riding my horse like an electric guitar
a six gun will shoot you where ever you are
riding my horse like an electric guitar
i am a cowboy
on an American star

but only for you

all i can give you is a memory
all i can remember is a song
when once the words had meaning for two
they're singing now but only for you


i had a daydream special to me
i once had your hand on my heart
when once the world had patience and care
now it's listening but you're not there

the table is set, you're not eating
the garden is ripe, you're away
i've cried;  my tears are an ocean
the storms surround me today

the air i breathe is so heavy
my bed is hard;  i'm alone
i've cried my tears are an ocean
empty the future i'm shown

all i can give you is a memory
all i can remember is a song
when once the words had meaning for two
they're singing now but only for you

Strawberries in your hair

there was this small strawberry-
i was picking in a farmer's patch-
and it looked so perfectly red and well-formed.
i glanced away, noticed that other people
were also picking near my row, but not close by.
My container was almost full, almost to
capacity, but there was room for more,
another berry, certainly.
As i knelt, i held this small strawberry, rotating the fruit
softly and slowly between my thumb and
forefinger, imaging the sweet taste.
i gave a brief tug to the cap and it snapped free.
The berry asked me in the most polite way-
berries can talk, you know-to do it the honor
of eating it, immediately and
i ate the berry and it was good.

the bread crumb trail

take this hand which will not shake
tell the world i've been consumed
the circus ride has now resumed
and all it wants to do is take
my self pity spread across the golden city
i'm getting dressed in nighttime pants
and powdered lips and a white lie tie
when you look at me i want to die
all i wanted was your romance
all i found was a heavy heart of steel
i can't find your better self
i can't even find myself
i can' tell you what is real
i gave myself a castle and a crowded walk
a princess and a fractured fairy tale
i looked for you on the bread crumb trail
but i never heard you talk
forty days and forty nights i groan
eating all the sadness on my plate
i'm living but i'll never hesitate
i'm living but i like it all alone
i'm living but i want to see you
when you're looking just for me
when we're both simply free
not approximately
but wholly

MRSA

it's never easy to walk a straight line
on my brother's twisted spine
he's a long-term paraplegic
with a short-term goal
of getting away from bed
without his MRSA sore burning hot and red
on his ass not his chest
it's an unwelcome guest
the hole looks like a lollipop crater
or the family tray that a waiter
would precariously balance as he
tip-toed on the floor
with food for four
and drinks for the house
the plug of puss looked like a mouse
with her nose stuffed full of cheese
asking for seconds, please
twitching her whiskers nervously
like the oars of a slave galley at sea
Billy had to endure the pain of discomfort
and avoid prolonged contact with his sore
he didn't want to be a bore
he stayed at home for several days
missed work, took sympathetic calls
he may not have working legs, but he's got balls
and a large fan base in Hondo and Castroville
who are praying that someday soon he'll
feel fine, again and write a book
so they can understand what it took
to heal a staph infection
which drilled into muscle
like Charlie Hustle
stole second and third, rounded home
and eye-balled some tasty bone

fiesta dish

there is never any end to Paris
and the powerful beacon of love
and wealth
as monstrously wide
and deeper
than the highest tide
the memory of each person who has lived there
differs from that of all others
and could be very happy
and very poor
and very certain
or certainly unsure
i wish i had died before i loved her
had taken that first train from the Gare de l'Est
but my writing
was dangerously good
so i failed
to do what i should
and skied unroped before the full winter snowfall
set over the silently hidden crevices
and i fell awkwardly
like a blind pilot fish
chilled like a jellied eel
in my own fiesta dish.

Hajj

from Medina
where He took flight
black and
white
and a golden patina
they walked in Mecca
7 times around
in chastity
in unity
the standing sound
well, pilgrim
look at this immensity
this Holy city
here is a power
where the stones fly
like a symbolic shower
they walked in Mecca
standing on the Plain of Arafat
in heat complete
millions paused and sat
withstood the sudden rains
the dust at midnight
in plain sight
they walked in Mecca
in peaceful temper
all fears allayed
and prayed

Maria Callas

when she said it was evolution
i was too damn small
i heard Maria Callas singing
in the Milano opera hall
and she was absolutely divine
so i thought i'd take a chance
i wore my evening jacket
but couldn't find my pants
i heard Keith Richards play
when i was just seventeen
he was absolutely wildly crazy
verging on the obscene
when she said it was evolution
i was too damn dumb
i took my tail and bellowed
with my long hair and my thumb
i watched Ari Onassis
wear his glasses in the shade
he accumulated people
and i knew he had it made
i watched Mick Jagger
wear his penis on his nose
he accumulated people
and he liked them without clothes
when she said it was evolution
i was too damn blind
i wrote a note to Santa Claus
but it was one he would not find
and when she drew my attention
to the force of gravity
i told her i could defy it
so i climbed back into my tree
i heard Maria Callas singing
with a butterfly in her hair
her voice like angel flowers
vocal passion everywhere
when she said it was evolution
i was too damn naive
i heard Maria Callas singing
and it was impossible to leave.

like a Javanese toy

young and alive
at twenty five
a clear head
and what was said
all right
good night
jeune fille
sleep well
and do tell
the beer was sipped
tongued and lipped
and swallowed
she followed
home where my canvas sits
and her black sweater
fingertips
well, i want to paint you a why
but you're artful and cry
looking away and tense
making good sense
i'll draw you tomorrow
dressed in sorrow
with a pencil
and a fine a l'eau
but now
from head to toe
like a Javanese toy
acting coy
i'll take you in my studio

the room

the lonely room
isn't a friend of mine
isn't a satisfied lover
or four leaf clover
no valentine
falling over
no music, no written word,
no secret can ever be heard
no glass of wine
the lonely room
isn't a friend of mine
isn't a satisfied lover
or first teenage kiss
no toe the line
no place i'll miss
no escape, to save my day
just not a place i want to stay
the lonely room
isn't a friend of mine

red heat black eye

this leather strap
slapping me on the back
red is the color of your heat
untying my feet
slipping on the floor
i can't give you anymore
than what you're looking for
but how can i be sure
every time you hug me
you really want to love me
you want to use me
punish and abuse me
seize me and deep freeze me
this crazy bed
and everything you said
black is the color of your eye
untying my cry
painted on your face
fancy boots and New York lace
i'll need another taste
but how can i be sure
everything you gave me
simply to enslave me
this simple life
cutting me like a knife
blue is the color of your charms
untying my arms
knocking on the door
i can't give you anymore
than what you're looking for
but how can i be sure
every time you hug me
you really want to love me
you want to use me
punish and abuse me
sieze me and deep freeze me
every time you hug me
you really want to love me
you want to use me

Darryl

Darryl died Sunday night
in an alleyway
in Hue
in fading light
shot in the head
a lucky hit
and he caught it
and he was dead
another Marine
came under fire
behind a large tire
by a sniper unseen
someone dragged Darryl
by his feet
away from the street
and over a barrel
to the University
where he was tagged
and bagged
and sent home free
often there was news
about this war
and more
for consumers to choose
but it wasn't a game
think street fight
shoot on sight
nothing tame
nothing certain
bullets flying
civilians dying
everyone hurting
to stop the spread
of Communism
this Baptism
of angry lead
meant Darryl's death
now we'll catch our breath
when the dust falls
and decks the halls
with bells of holly
fa la la la la
la la la
la

no more sugar

no more sugar, baby
it's driving me crazy
no more drinking on Friday night
our candles are lit by a campfire light
no more squeeze no more tease
i'm begging you please
keep your pants on
it's closing time until i'm gone
no more sugar, baby
it's driving me crazy
no more kissing inside my ear
your tongue is busy keeping me near
no more squeeze no more tease
i'm begging you please
keep the music on
until the new dawn
how can i want you
when i need you
but when you free me
everyone can finally see me
soaking in this lonely rain
dripping wet inside my pain
do you see what you believe?
nothing hiding up my sleeve
now it's time for me to leave
no more sugar, baby
it's driving me crazy
no more sugar, baby

looking for the devil

hey little boy walking down your street of joy looking for the devil playing with your little toy life back home will never be the same graveyard shift exploding in your brain the war is never over rolling in a bed of clover walking steps with your rifle in the air no one ever said it's gonna be fair looking for the back door side door gunner gonna get me some, gonna get my share hey little man walking on the desert sand looking for the devil even Jesus can't understand life back home will never be the same graveyard shift exploding in your brain i can never kill enough i'm just so God damn tough kicking ass and kicking down doors drinking whiskey and kissing whores punching out lights and acting hard blowing bridges in my front yard life back home will never be the same graveyard shift exploding in your brain looking for the devil but finding only pain life back home will never be the same