Jim and Tammy Faye

Jim and Tammy Faye
wetting their ministry bed
living in an abandoned bale of hay
moved to a sleek houseboat
with a rich Christian goat
which they milked for millions of dollars;
they drove a 1953 Rolls-Royce
and enjoyed a large choice
of the best cuts of steak
Jim went on the Evangelical take
and eventually went to jail
Tammy Faye took her tanned tail
and married their best friend
yet the Bakker affair
didn't quietly end there
no, more frosted blonde tresses
loud, colorful dresses
and a reality TV show
born-again kept on the go-go
night and day dressing like pimps
anything for money:  you want limps?
tears on the thick make-up
passing around the collection cup
to poor whites with meager social security and welfare checks
more train wrecks
coming to a big tent near you
Jim and Tammy Faye
practicing their special blend of voodoo
it's what they practiced and were trained to do
stuck between the social cracks
found on the harder-edged side of the tracks.

almost like The Who

i heard you on the piano
it was everything i needed to know
we didn't have any more hands to show
almost like The Who
and then i knew
we'd learn about the complete history
believe there was no longer a mystery
the nights when there was a full moon in the dark sky
and we no longer had to wonder why
because we couldn't be fooled
we wouldn't be ruled
when we heard a sharp screaming in the night
we'd laugh in hysterical delight
at whatever came down we'd be alright
we couldn't be slowed
and we wouldn't be mowed
and no one knew where we wanted to go
it was everything we wanted to know
we didn't have any more hands to show
almost like The End
and then, my friend
we'd learn about the complete history
believe there was no longer a mystery
the days when there was a bright sun in the blue sky
and we no longer had to wonder why
because we couldn't be fooled
we wouldn't be ruled
when we heard a sharp screaming in the night
we'd laugh in hysterical delight
at whatever came down we'd be alright
we couldn't be slowed
and we wouldn't be mowed
and no one knew where we wanted to go
it was everything we wanted to know
we didn't have any more hands to show.

went to town

went to town
'cause i knew you might be around
and i knew it might be fun
i knew it might be nice
the last time i saw you
we kissed each other twice
and there you were
corner of sunset and vine
sitting on a park bench
waiting to be mine
went to town
'cause i knew you might be around
and i knew it might be fun
i knew it might be nice
the last time i saw you
we kissed each other twice
and then we talked
planning some good times and more
i saw into your eyes
it's you i adore
went to town
'cause i knew you might be around
and i knew it might be fun
i knew it might be nice
the last time i saw you
we kissed each other twice
and there you were
corner of sunset and vine
sitting on a park bench
waiting to be mine.

let's see where it goes!

i gave you my hand
and you touched my face
i asked you for a second bite
and you gave me a first taste
as we walked along the waterfront
the cobbled streets kept us on our toes
a shooting star shot far over our heads
and you said "Let's see where it goes!"
so we went into a back alleyway where
a bakery smelled like fresh bread
and the baker shouted when we made inquiries
that she didn't hear exactly what we said
then there was a bar near where we were
that had an open seat or two
and we were surprised to find that our appetites
knew what they'd like us to do
when there was a steady wind
and the afternoon threat of rain
while i sipped my beer you a ginger ale
and you spoke of your pain
you've been through a rough period
and all i could do was pick up the check
wiping my hands with the clean napkin
i was guilty of eating sloppily and neglect
but we are all happily imperfect
being everything that we possibly could
and when you wanted to go knocking
we found a handy piece of wood
and hit it as hard as our fingers allowed
before the approaching storm cloud
and the heavy rain and hail
forced the power launches and the sail
into the nearest safe anchorage
where we were waiting
in whispers and still together
dressed for success
in any type of weather.

Blue Moon Boys

in Tennessee
i left the freeway
and climbed the big backyard tree
once owned by Elvis Presley
before he hit the sack
of an apparent heart attack
he had a collection of fancy Cadillac
with a mom and dad all the way from Tupelo
the Blue Moon Boys put on quite a jail house show
and they had quite a long drive, you know,
before Elvis threw his gyrating hips out of joint
trying to make a famous black & white point
at the lonely Heartbreak Hotel
he had a special wishing well
filled with nothing but blue suede shoes
which made it easy for him to choose
so, baby, do anything you want to do
in Tennessee
but don't play hard ball games with Rockabilly boys
they'll hit you with a Chuck Berry tune and dazzle with their toys
flying all the way to Nashville
they'll eat until they get their fill
of Memphis and the Now or Never Pill
with rhythm and blues and an old hound dog
in Tennessee
they don't eat much frog.

fly him to the moon

hey, why be pissed
someday maybe even he'll be missed
but not anytime soon
fly him to the moon
let the lack of air keep him there
with his orange hair
and the people running in full scream
so unlike any cartoon dream
it's a full blown nightmare
but why should anyone care?
putting on the ninth green
Mr. Grinch and Mr. Mean
and i'm wondering how to keep score
the Middle East had it's share of war
in two-part harmony
from sea to shining sea
the center of the Universe
is more than a coin-filled purse
but for friends they have the crackers,
the Russian thugs and hackers
in the wild and wooly west wing
what romance songs do they sing?
do they memorize the whole thing?
hey, take a prolonged break
separate the real from the obvious fake
look left and look right
it's natural to pick a fight
with a moron and his flacks
if asked a question they turn their backs
and say i don't know
it's the Howdy Doody Show
and here we are now
sitting like a snow plow
in a place where the space race
in a trance and at a pace
has already been run
and i'm watching the mid-day sun
but it's midnight
my chest is getting tight
humanity has yet to be civilized
and i wonder if they ever realized
that last page is being turned
what have they learned?
hey, why be pissed
someday maybe even he'll be missed
but not anytime soon
fly him to the moon
let the lack of air keep him there
with his orange hair
and the people running in full scream
so unlike any cartoon dream
it's a full blown nightmare
but why should anyone care?

the Empire bombed the doors

Gerald was the fancy one
Sarah the pain in his ass
he offered her a taste of champagne
but she smashed the crystal glass,
they walked down a busy street
on a stormy Friday night;
he tried to explain their romance
but he could never make it right.
and when they came to an intersection
where the barricades still stood tall,
he asked her what she loved the most
and she could never recall;
then a woman with a legal guide,
immigration papers in her hand,
asked Sarah for directions
but she failed to understand
once upon a time in America
a man could take a wife
and she became a partner
and they'd work to make a life;
their dream was a family night
when no one hid out of sight;
no constant humming of Star Wars
when the evil Empire bombed the doors
and rebels yelled and ran
to find an honest man.
Gerald was the fancy one
Sarah the pain in his ass
he offered her a taste of champagne
but she smashed the crystal glass,
so they walked down a busy street
on a stormy Friday night;
he tried to explain their romance
but he could never get it right.

Texas Night

i bought her a pretty diamond ring
on a sweet lone star Texas Night
and everything we played turned out just right
she wanted to dance and i wanted to sing
so we sat down in a big double chair
and i thought we made such a lovely pair
we went everywhere exploring for hours
acting silly with each other picking bouquets of Bluebell flowers
having Big D fun we never felt like we were done
people looked at us floating on our big sky cloud
on a sweet lone star Texas night
and everything we played turned out just right
she wanted it soft and i wanted it loud
we ate our Mexican food and pranked and drank
ran out of money and robbed the local bank
saw the famous Alamo and made a final stand
heard their grave appeals for a helping hand
we pushed hard against the famous Mission door
on a sweet lone star Texas Night
and everything we played turned out just right
and we wanted a little and then we wanted more
so we sat down in the center of town
looked for a hot time but there was no one else around
we went everywhere exploring for hours
acting silly with each other picking bouquets of Bluebell flowers
having fun we never felt like we were done.

he drew her heart

she had been painted by him.
he drew her heart!
he loved her so much,
almost from the very start;
and he was highly amused
when she sat on the beach;
he reached for her
but she swam out of reach,
picked up a shell;
it smelled of the sea
so he grabbed her,
sat her on his knee
and told her
he wanted to see her everyday.
but she took it slow;
she didn't want to stay.
he became breathless
and left her for a drink
while she went to the hotel
to clear her head and think.
though it was already night
it would soon be noon.
he asked her when she would be ready
and she told him soon,
so he fell quiet in the garden
not far from the busy street.
the dirt was fertile;
it smelled of freshly washed feet.
and she grew in his memory;
she walked inside his head.
he loved what she was dreaming of
and everything she said.

Cole Porter and the cow

before the cake was served,
a jazzy cow perched atop
the fireman's ladder and
milked the scene for
all it could;
chilled champagne
with busty clowns
and dancing by ballerinas
almost sank the boat;
the captain in his cabin
wore a dress uniform
while holding
a smoking pipe;
one male passenger
who was afraid of
seasickness
emptied a bag of toys;
a holly wreath
bought for the holidays
hung from the ceiling
in the main lounge
with the inscription
'Homeward Bound';
before the cruise was over,
Cole Porter finished his last
musical piece and went off
to find a new place:
Cap d'Antibes was too hot
in the summer for the English,
but the splendid piano stayed in tune
while he was at the bench.

Khe Sanh

it was a dark night
on a distant hill
the bad ass hombres
were looking to kill
and i was just a little fart
not much taller than an apple cart
with a big mean gun
and i knew it wouldn't be much fun
diving into my trench
sprayed with graffiti mostly written in French
which said 'Welcome to Khe Sanh'
but i put my combat helmet on
and dove when the B-40 rockets flew
i saw other Marines and i knew
we'd stick together shooting at the charging bad guys
while the Air Force, Navy, AC-130 Spooky, shit, everything that flies
were buzzing the mountain air
and shrapnel from explosions ripped everywhere
soft flesh and muddy red ground
hell, i kept firing and looked around
and the smoke was thick
i wondered if i'd get sick
but this was no time to act weak
my anger began to peak
when i saw fellow soldiers fall
and heard that damn bugle call
the bad ass hombres started to crawl
onto the Command Post sand bags
their once new uniforms ripped like rags
from the barbed wire strung outside our lines
and the napalm and buried mines
and artillery shells and morter rounds
kept a nightmarish pounding and the warrior sounds
ringing in my ear
i knew i had nothing to fear.

everything we just said

oh baby
i'm driving you crazy
while you're driving me out of my head
oh, it wasn't just what we did
it was everything that we just said
i should have told you the high heels
were a mess
and you shouldn't fool around or make me guess
took too long
for you and i to get along
our good times are getting rough
and i think i've had trouble enough
it's hard to keep playing a waiting game
when i'm always the only one you blame
so it's time to take the evening train
leaving from the station at ten
and if you ask when i'm coming back
oh baby
i really don't know when
the long distance when we would touch
didn't seem to bother you too much
but when i got hot
you did not;
now i'm getting old
and you're growing so cold
oh baby
i'm driving you crazy
while you're driving me out of my head
oh, it wasn't just what we did
it was everything we just said

the world was broke

the world was broke

each morning you dressed in black
it always tried coming back

but yesterday
the skies stayed grey
the tower where you lived
had a window repaired
crowds of frightened people
stood and stared
the first lady in real furs
the latest edition of his and hers
i watched you take the throne
like a little dog takes the owner's bone
a screaming eyesore
from nearest sea to distant shore
one proud boast
from Atlantic to Pacific coast
one mouthful a small country
one large swallow the whole world
stars and stripes unfurled
the gentle winds gather into a storm
everyone is getting warm
but Muslim cool is getting hot
pluralism left to rot
from the campus of Berkeley
protest fires continue to burn
one liners repeated over and over
help the simple-minded learn
the tall ships reaching the New York harbor slip
passengers taking a hit
night time might be the right time
if that's not too sublime
an attempt to run
but the roads are steep
down the alleyways
chased by the heat
across the grassland of Central Park
and past the Spring Roll man
into the underground railroad
beyond the corner trash can:
the world was broke
each morning you dressed in black
it always tried coming back
but yesterday
the skies stayed grey.