where the ferry docked

i was not interested in the dull
but she had a passion for it
which i found regrettable.
i would much rather read the
fully pornographic book than
flip through merely indecent pages.
she deplored the lurid,
discovering pleasure while reading Oprah's book of the month,
apparently forming opinions based on it.
she would never pay any price,
while i once knew how to score drugs, very good drugs.
i wanted to dine and drink and dance and make out
with gorgeous women who did not always come free.
i wanted to wear a dinner jacket even when she didn't want
to go out for dinner, which was often.
i wanted to mingle and nuzzle a neck with my day old growth
and she wanted to knit a pair of socks for a neighbor's child.
i didn't know the neighbor had a child.
and although i had only a few more months to live,
i was not yet done.
i still wanted to be where it was both high and low, stealing so many
wives away from their husbands as possible.
i shared a box with the Lincolns, but it was a play she didn't
want to attend.
the play was set above the sea, close to a Grand Hotel and
opposite the place where a ferry docked.
i took that ferry and never returned.