the short version

there's a hole in the sky
and i put my finger up there
and it went inside the hole
and at that moment i lost my finger
but found myself
swinging over a fresh water creek
holding onto a braided rope with
everything i had
minus the finger, of course,
and it didn't seem to matter that
the day might be long or short
as long as the water was deep where i fell into it
and that's the short version
of a story about a favorite dog and a man
who walked the woods with an imperfect eye.

my first rodeo

i went to my first rodeo
where i saw tough cowgirls riding the big red bulls
near the meandering river down in old San Antonio
where often there are no official rules
and it was a hot and dusty day
i kept drinking cold Mexican beer
i heard a celebration of curious holiday noise
filled with apparently good cheer
loud parades of merry makers some riding wild horses
some riding each other
they knew i was an outsider from a cold northern shore
but i didn't have to travel undercover
they kept showing me ever more
and there appeared an old man wearing gold trimmed black pants
who carried a big busty 12 string guitar
i watched him work his way around the crowded tables
of a fancy hotel bar
he wore a giant's hat which covered his eyes and his head
when he sang his songs it was hard to hear exactly what it was he said
i felt like he was writing sad words on his black satin shirt
but no one listening rose to ask him why it seemed he was so full of hurt
he moved away with a slow shuffle and an audible sigh
he could have asked for some money but he didn't even try
i saw him kick the dirt from his boots as he hit the front door
the lazy lovers and the tourists didn't see him cry
and an elderly couple kept dancing on the ballroom floor
the music might have stopped but their hearts kept beating in tune
i just about decided to stick around for the sight of a big time Texas moon
when the old man starting singing in a nearby street
i saw people stop and gather around with their ten dollar drinks in hand
they lost interest when they heard him hum about the strong and the weak
and soon they wandered off to listen to a popular local band
i watched him pack his sorrows and stroll to the famous plaza of the Alamo
and i would soon follow but wasn't sure how best to go.

what i wanted to say

i'm anxious
and she's waiting
we once were so far apart
but now we're dating
on a warm summer day
if i knew how to pull it all together
i 'd say exactly what i had to say
i can remember her from a better yesterday
she came in on the four thirty five
more than twenty one and completely alive
and after many hours of our give and take
well, for Heaven's sake
she told me she had to go
and what i really want to know
is
where's the road to the distant shore
because i can't take this anymore
i'm anxious
and she's waiting
we once we so far apart
but now we're dating
on a warm summer day
if i knew how to pull it all together
i'd say exactly what i had to say.

come on dark

sitting down
i have nothing to do
my dreams won't come now
i'm sad and i'm blue

no one's here
you've left and gone away
you once were so near
why couldn't you stay?

come on dark
wrap black arms around me
pull out my sad heart
become destiny

slow down time
my days are growing old
if you can't be mine
my fingers turn cold

sitting down
i have nothing to do
my dreams won't come now
i'm sad and i'm blue

music ends
a quiet descended
i've lost many friends
and now we've ended

sitting down
i have nothing to do
my dreams won't come now
i'm sad and i'm blue

so play me the sax

so play me the sax,
jacks
and all the little jills
handing out their thrills
their horny sounds
keep coming around
from deeper underground
and that echo rang in my head
all i could ever hope for i said
when i was carried to my bed
and the next day came to soon
i thought i could see the harvest moon
but it was only a fleeting glance
i got up to square dance
and a fat girl got up to sing
i gave her a wink she gave me everything
she had but it was too much
i reached and she was out of touch
like a radio station out of tune
and the next day came to soon
it seemed my fever was one hundred two
on election day i didn't know what to do
so i spent the night in a safari tent
had myself registered as an independent
and read the news until i felt the saddest blues
pull me into an alcoholic funk
and woke up in the gutter but i swear i'm not a drunk
the bad guys are getting all the good press
and they'll win every game they play unless
somebody stops the fast ball on the way down
town
or the foul line gets redefined as fair
i once thought i could help but i'm no longer there
now the crowd isn't one i'd be too happy to meet
they're running their mouths on the steep banks of Wall Street
and the bell is ringing like a strange fool
without thinking about being really cool
i tried my hand at being a beat writer
i covered sports and loved a certain Philadelphia fighter
who wore black shorts and had crooked teeth
with a mean streak and no steady religious belief
his gym was a dark hole and he gave me a dark soul
so play me the sax,
jacks
and all the little jills
handing out their thrills
their horny sounds
keep coming around
from deeper underground
and that echo rang in my head
all i could ever hope for i said
when i was carried to my bed
and the next day came to soon
i thought i could see the harvest moon
but it was only a fleeting glance
i got up to square dance
and a fat girl got up to sing
i gave her a wink she gave me everything.

a souvenir of 1969

Tu Do Street
hot and dry and teeming with bikes
and anxious smiles
far from the unwashed feet of black sandals
carrying just-baked white loaves of
warm bread along
with a small bottle of fish sauce
tucked into a secret universe,
a baby bag of white rice,
and a can of coke-a-cola expertly flattened into red,
white, and aluminum thinness
to become a wall or a roof
or a souvenir
from a time when Catholics
and Buddhists,
and Atheists and Christians and
young boys and girls,
old women with black teeth,
and old men with thin arms,
sank together into the mud of a dried river bed
looking for bones and shells,
but finding a naked sword
to hold up high.

what i always said

so thanks for the time alone
when the seeds were perfectly sown
and i left my birthday bed
which is what i always said
would come to pass
and there is no use wondering why
all my friends urged me to continue to try
looking for the springs and streams
wondering what living and loving really means
and i'm running out of spending money
so thanks for the time alone, honey
and all those episodes of Lost In Space
disappearing into the five and dime without a trace
and the uneaten plates of white Princess bread
which is what i always said
would come to pass
and there is no use wondering why
i read your Dear John letter and began to cry
turned to the second page you signed "With Regard"
tried to recover but it became real hard
like an iron heart that sank to the bottom of the sea
i looked in a mirror and saw no one there but me
so thanks for the time alone
when the seeds were perfectly sown
and i left my birthday bed
which is what i always said
would come to pass
and there is no use wondering why
all my extra time is spent dreaming of a star-filled sky
looking for the springs and streams
wondering what living and loving really means
and i'm running out of spending money
so thanks for the time alone, honey
yes, it's sweet but not the treat
that can be shared
and when i knew you no longer cared
i got up and left my birthday bed
which is what i always said
would come to pass.

a special red

she was wearing pink
and her mouth was running full
over the nearest hill
came a damn fool
he asked for a quick bite to eat
his wine a special red
the lady said she was hungry
she asked to be fed
and with a fork and a silver spoon
questions on his tongue
the fool said he'd like to sing
but the songs remained unsung
throughout the first night
and into their memory book
the fool gave her what he could
she gave him more than she took
and it made him think
she was wearing pink
then she wore nothing at all
it led to his downfall
he asked for another mountain to climb
she gave him the kitchen floor
his wine a special red
they sat playing by her back door
questions on his tongue
the fool said he'd like to sing
but the songs remained unsung.

The Sacred Heart by Dali (1929)

Salvador Dali
came into perfect view
flirting with you
and painting me
walked toward a Spanish horizon
approached the southern sea
where he found a vast stash of cash
and his model sailboat
stopped suddenly
and asked politely for his winter coat
but it turned out to be too small
or maybe he had recently grown too tall
so he went around the Barcelona block
where he found a melting alarm clock
and a bleeding red eye
it didn't particularly appeal to him but i
rescued him from the intense cold
he started to grow sensitive and acted old
shouted to a nearby friend
played with perspective
and ticking time which he would twist and bend
into a happy birthday cake
well, for Heaven's sake
some things are not what they appear to be
and he kept painting me
because i was not averse to reciting verse
or running after a disappearing leaf
his social scene was like a moving film
of pleasurable mischief
and 1931 records of New Orleans jazz
but that's not all that he has
there seemed no time to spare
i asked him for a secret but he wouldn't share
and when he did i simply had too much wine
to remember if it was dark or light
i subsequently made him my mistress
but somehow that didn't feel right
he was a famous artist and i an unemployed tailor
dressed in my best uniform like a crucified sailor
escaping an abusive dad
it wasn't my only destiny but it was all i had
so i worked very hard and grew a faint smile
Dali was intrigued and asked me to stay awhile
and during the course of our future cruises
i noticed he had blasphemous wins but occasionally loses
he was prepared to be known
as someone who had grown
with talent like The Sacred Heart
i once caused a scandal when i deserted him
before his printmaking had a decent chance to start
life kept intruding
it finally pulled us apart
when he used India ink to spit on his mother
whom he had really adored
i tried to curry favor with my brother
as we sat together on a comfortable perch
Dali got up from his bench and attacked the church
he never called me again even when i heard times seemed good
so our story ended with a rough outline as it ultimately should.

a dance of two

i took her inside
the room opened into a storm
and the storm became a trumpet in my hand
in my heart, through me
i blew the horn and heard a sound
trees in the squall; heart into another world
and do all the rules still apply?
never, no rules now or ever
bouncing across the floor, into the light are
fields of yellow, flashing, yelling, no more
emphatically on the bedroom floor
never to arise, to say again once more
the heart of darkness came into view
blackness, glow through me, never to stop
like lyrics which when younger i always knew
shout forth, no thought, words flew.

stray cat blues #2

she was sweet as sugar
as she danced across the stage
she had twelve curtain calls
then climbed back in her cage
i was all-natural honey number three
who stung her all night long for free
i was a pistol-shooting son of a gun
but she told me i wasn't the only one
who told her that
then she gave me a slap!
i kept falling into her trap
kissing her and acting sincere
she gave me the sweetest reason to be near
well, that's no way to win my heart
i kept hoping for another start
when she finally called my name
well, it might be too late to catch the early train
but it's not too late to ring the bell
to play the game of show and tell
she was sweet as sugar
as she danced across the stage
she had twelve curtain calls
then climbed back in her cage
she knelt down to eat her meal
man, that's how i wanted to feel
i told her i was a pistol-shooting son of a gun
but she told me i wasn't the only one
who told her that
she gave me a slap!
i kept falling into her trap.

Babe Ruth

in the end
i did four
pencil sketches of a friend
and a fifth
we drank empty the very next day
before we went sailing
into San Francisco bay
where we met a company
who had just left on a tour of the coast
but that wasn't the least or the most
that we smoked or drank
on the wooden boat before it sank
in a sudden blast
which torn down our single mast
it felt like we ran aground
and wouldn't too easily be found
on the crossing ferry
nearing the busy Sausalito shore
so i tried my free hand
at house-boat-keeping but the decor
kept looking like a combination of dimly lit sun and windy sea
and didn't resemble the tranquility
that i sought
so i did two major paintings
and after two days they remained un-bought
i traveled down to Oakland
where the hungry dealer
agreed to introduce me to people who partied in the air
but when i met them there
they asked me what i admire
and i told them i like nature,
want her proportions to be free,
that they shouldn't resemble me
but their laughter died when i bent to tie my shoe
they left for the zoo
and that's the honest history
of a recent sailing trip
with one notable difference from the truth:
my name has never been Babe Ruth
and i don't know why
but i once saw the blue sky
and the sexy beach
shimmering within reach
when i looked out from the heaving deck
and
a piece of wood floating on the desert sand
with a fateful message fixed by my own hand
and a lady giving me a clue
not of when exactly but who
in the way she expressed herself i felt there was a chance
before the foghorns sounded we'd have the next dance
and would sleep
wrapped together in each other's arms
reciting poetry in our dreams
at least that's what it seems
like
when i ride my bike.

Miss Couldn't Miss

man, we popped him upside the head
left him in the center of the street
stone-cold on the verge of being extremely dead
and the last thing that he said
when we tossed him into his bed
was
he wanted another round of big boy meal
so how did that feel?
we sent out a quick appeal
went looking for a last kiss
we found our famous Miss Couldn't Miss
and she took aim where it wouldn't hurt
grabbed her hem and showed him the inside of her uptown skirt
she was never one to pass up a chance to flirt
man, she gave him a headlong fake
stuffed her oven and got ready to bake
readied her garden with a long leaf rake
slapped down her ten dollar stare
pulled a pin and let loose all her hair
pulled weeds from the fertility bed
man, we popped him upside the head
left him in the center of the street
stone-cold on the verge of being extremely dead
and the last thing that he said
when we tossed him into his bed
was
he wanted a chance to sing his own song
he was sure he could keep it from going wrong
not too short and not too long
well, we took him at his word
and the next thing that we heard
was the sound of a duet and so how'd that feel?
we sent out a quick appeal
went looking for a last kiss
we found our famous Miss Couldn't Miss
and she took aim where it wouldn't hurt
she was never one to pass up a chance to flirt
she gave it her all
and pretty soon we all began to fall
and we stayed down
hitting all the back roads in town
slipping away and never again were found.

we left everything else up to fate

i spent the night in bed
underneath her sheet
she was the finest woman that any man
could ever hope to meet
she grabbed my heart and tried to massage
my back and tickle my feet
so i took her for a slow dance and a fast-food bite
to eat
she looked fine to me and that's what i cared about
it didn't matter to me that other men saw her
and i'd sometimes hear them shout
i'd grab her on my way to the kitchen for a morning piece of pie
she'd give me a bite
and i'd give her the eye
sometimes i'd turn on the daylight
and other times it was enough to imagine her smile
we'd sit by the dinner table for a little while
i'd sing her a love song and she'd sing me a lullaby
we'd laugh like kids and then we'd cry
thinking of all our days already gone by
and it seemed sad but we were glad
counting all the blessings that our lives had
i no longer wanted to think about the mean or the bad
she no longer wanted to go home alone to an un-watered flower
so we decided to turn a lonely minute into a beautiful country hour
and all we had to do
was promise to stay true
determined to travel the same road with our heads held high
it was her and i
and we left everything else up to fate
we didn't want to be late
we ate everything on our plate!

1925

in Juan-les-Pins,
the spearhead of the avant-garde
got very little attention
when the new painter arrived at seven
with images for sale.
their words were clear
and their poetic surfaces nicely polished,
but they did not follow the painter inside
for a studio visit
where he made a feast
and drank deeply, almost alone.
and so, shortly,
more paintings came in a constant supply
and eclipsed their best writing
by a large distance
even though they spent the summer
working on an obligatory tan.

deeper into things

there is no one here and the lights are turned low
possibly i wanted to go
deeper into things that i didn't know
and the trip was anything but sweet
i didn't see anyone whispering on the street
in this new game of quid pro quo
trying to get a hot ticket to the one-way show
but the room is dark and the buzz is crowd noise
tickling all the little circus boys
all prim and proper in their schoolyard poise
and the trip was anything but sweet
i didn't see anyone whispering on the street
in this new game of quid pro quo
well, there was a price to pay and i had cash
with a constant supply of day-old trash
the object was for love to be brash
and the trip was anything but sweet
i didn't see anyone whispering on the street
in this new game of quid pro quo
trying to get a hot ticket to the one-way show.

i could never stay away

i used to know a lonely girl
who lived on the floor below
she often liked to tease me
about what i didn't know
and because she had an appetite
she asked to take the biggest bite
well, it was an exciting night
and the very next day
i could never stay away
yes, the rains might come
and i would always try to get me some
and then the morning sun
well, it was always excellent fun
under white sheets and near the bar
she never let me get very far
she was on the phone demanding
she had me bending at the knees
before i would get erect
i asked her pretty please
and she told me i had a handsome face
red lipstick and the finest lace
all wrapped loose around her waist
and because she had an appetite
she asked to take the biggest bite
well, it was an exciting night
and the very next day
i could never stay away
yes, the rains might come
and i always would try to get me some
and then the morning sun
well, it was always excellent fun
under white sheets and near the bar
she never let me get very far

i could kill the Atlantic

guerrillas in the trees
presumably on their knees
wondering what more to do
painting the town red, white, and blue
and hide-and-seek,
gambling for the weak.
was it really for a year?
i see no one coming near
the staccato of a shout
kept me looking round about
and i intended to see
someone else looking out for me
but she might have been shy
i never understood why
in Monte Carlo
i wanted to play bingo
and ended up broke
so that's what i wrote
at the end of the final game
there was no one to blame
a scenario
said the impresario
before he fled the casino
leaving me high and dry
i never understood why
i could have killed the choreography
but that's not really me
i know i could kill the Atlantic
but that's not really romantic
so i hummed
and strummed
and drew
because what i knew
when afflicted with a bout of angina
was how to reassemble a vagina
and the girl is down the hall
it's past time for me to call
when she hears me this early in the season
i won't need a reason
she won't ask for any whys
when i come visiting between her thighs.

drinking on the Vine

drinking on the Vine
waiting for a friend of mine
i'm not in a particular hurry
the lights are low
she'll be here when she's ready
i'll ask her later where she wants to go.
sitting on a stool
i'm not acting like a fool
watching ladies dancing on bar
i see them smile
she'll be here when she's ready
i'll just keep waiting for a little while.
wondering all night
is everything all right?
the crowd spinning bottles on the floor
the girls acting nice
she'll be here when she's ready
but pretty soon i'll be as cold as ice.
drinking on the Vine
waiting for a friend of mine
i'm not in a particular hurry
the lights are low
she'll be here when she's ready
i'll ask her later where she wants to go.

maybe renaissance

maybe renaissance
maybe a dance
but on the first night
i woke up
i was in a moonstruck trance
sitting on the wall of an older house
i saw the shadow of a running mouse
he kept looking at me
i wondered what he hoped to see
i wasn't angry or uptight
but i wasn't filled with delight
it was still my first night
i had many long hairs
several romances and lasting cares
i slept in the room upstairs
where i took many rests
i phoned imaginary loves and greeted guests
i couldn't toss a pillow
but i found a modern fight
maybe renaissance
maybe a dance
but on the first night
very drunk
i grabbed my hand and packed my trunk
stood on my head
it's what the instruction book once said
what more could i have done?
went looking for a party to have some fun
to uncork a bottle and to come undone
i came up with some kind of costume
skipped a beat or two and sang an artistic tune
overheard
a discouraging word
but i kept it out of my mind
see, i'm not an anarchist
i went looking simply to be kissed
put on my best suit and seductive tie
saw a woman looking me in the eye
i thought i'd wait for awhile
i saw her smile
maybe this would become the start of something new
what more could i do?
i heard her whisper and say "It's you!"
maybe renaissance
maybe a dance
but on the first night
i woke up
i was in a moonstruck trace
she gave me money but i wanted to dance
she offered me respect
but i wanted love
i could hear the running mouse
he was in the great room above
and there were a great many more
underneath the bedroom floor
i went looking for the open door
when i felt the wind blowing on my face
felt no disgrace
put a foot in the street and another one in my mouth
headed south
maybe this would become the start of something new
what more could i do?
i heard her whisper and say "It's you!"

pay attention to grief

when my words seemed indifferent
hit my chin and the floor
i couldn't find a reason
to stay around anymore:
it wasn't impossible to see!
she tossed tears in the air
they splashed on the new carpet
made a mess of my hair.
i might have stayed focused
offered hugs and a drink
but acting so dumb
i forgot how to think.
in the warm shallow waters
of absorption with Self
i settled like dust
on a library shelf.
unwilling to reach out
or unable to feel
but regardless of cause
i became the true heel.
now everyone listen:
pay attention to grief
if feeling inadequate
turn a new leaf.
comfort the wounded
tend to their pain
your offer to listen
gives them much more to gain.

looking for a star

she would never call my name
when i was standing on the street corner
looking for a taste of sweet shame
and i finally found a tasty bite
it was the middle of a lonely night
i heard a dog howl
there was a chill to the air
i went looking for an envelope but found an affair
what would i do now?
the next time i looked at the ticking clock
i found myself on a different neighborhood block
and the woman stayed in the passenger lane
i thought they said sunny but all i felt was rain
there was a lot of traffic roaring and making noise
i looked in their windows filled with strangely funny toys
i used to play with making up and making out
a woman smiled and said she liked to shout
we'd soon be in the back seat holding hands
listening closely all we'd hear were the electric bands
don't get too excited i liked to say
we'll soon be traveling to another town
maybe i'll be able to put some longer roots down
and maybe we'll find another place to stay
i've been thinking about those days now long gone
they're so far out of reach and out of touch
i don't want to say too much
after a bad first part i'd like to repair my open heart
but i'm not a doctor i'm a happy priest
or a follower of things divine at least
i'd like to think so
standing on the road-side curb i have to ask again
is this the right way to go?
what more is there for me to know?
maybe i'll try the famous Texas Two-Step in Amarillo
but what if i'm too small?
because that cowboy dance expects everyone to be tall
i used to know how to do the twist and the jitterbug
now all those steps are being swept underneath the memory rug
only an old man can say he's gone fishing
when what he really means is he's gone to the well wishing
looking for a star
when a woman came walking up and said "I know who you are!"
last time I saw myself
i was driving away with her in my antique car
and we stayed in the passing lane
i thought they said sunny but all i felt was rain
and if i could
i'd do it all over again without the convertible top
giving no thought to slowing or coming to an early stop
bouncing over rough washboard roads
into a soft resort town
maybe we'll be able to put some longer roots down.

on the new train

on the new train
i took the evening ride
there was a hot and hungry woman
and i sat by her side
she was playing with her face
sipping a chilled white wine
and out the nearest window
everything was looking fine
i asked for her name
i was feeling pretty cool
she gave me a curious glance
and she called me a fool
so i took my book and laid it down
i gave her a frown
but i was determined
not to make an unkind sound
all the passengers close by
fingered their evening meals
i asked her for the reason
but heard only the passing of steel wheels
the conductor studied my ticket
said my stop was coming soon
i kept looking out the window
and kept seeing the full moon
it's a place i wish to visit
i'd be the man in the night sky
there'd be no reason to worry
there'd be no reason to cry
the train kept moving forward
so i picked up my book
there was a hot and hungry woman
but i didn't dare look
i knew an end was fast approaching
my heart in pain
i thought i should say something but
there was nothing more to gain
another stop and whistle blow
straight lines are easy to follow
another station and soon another page
i got up and walked off the stage
carried my luggage and carried my book
there was a hot and hungry woman
but i didn't dare look
i wasn't looking for a romance
i didn't want to be a tramp
and when the darkness tried to swallow me
i pulled out my lamp
there was a cheap room at the motel
a rented key for the door
there was a hot and hungry woman
but i didn't need her no more.

the longest nipple

the girl with the longest nipple!
i asked her what it was all about
but she ran out of the house
i can remember her departing shout.
that nipple was longer than my neck
and skinny like an old farmer's mule
i tried each night to measure it
but never found the proper tool
you know, it was an anomaly
as different as night is from day
a friend once asked how it compared
and i couldn't find the exact word to say
a nipple like a spaghetti noodle
but cold and totally indifferent
it never showed the slightest shiver
regardless of how much time i spent
and before she ran tripping into the street
her nipple in her hand
i sucked it down my open throat
in an effort to more fully understand.